The last time I agreed to play an extra in some theatrical production, I ended up cast as Old Montegue in “Romeo and Juliet”. This time would be different. This time, I wasn’t in some high school stage production, but in a 3-part German made-for-TV film. Of course, the role they used me for still ended up being different than I had expected.

I got a call on Monday afternoon on my cell phone. The woman (Frau Muhri) on the line was the casting agent for this TV mini-series titled “Speer und Er”. Speer is Albert Speer who was Minister of Defense during the Third Reich. Er refers to Adolf Hitler. (In a way it’s a shame that the name Adolf will be forever linked to that man. I can’t decide on an adjective strong enough to convey my feelings about him.) The phone conversation took about 15 minutes and was completely in German. I scheduled a fitting for the next day, was given cursory directions on how to find the place and told emphatically, “don’t be late.”

I arrived on the lot about an hour and a half before I was called. I grabbed a bite to eat and then asked where to find this building I needed (Villa 2). Turns out it was in a set piece where they didn’t quite finish the insulation (or install any heating). And, of course, after the admonition to be on time they were ready to fit me promptly at 1530 (my appointment was for 1345).

Once the fitting was done, it was off to Maske (make-up) to get a haircut. It was decided I should be a German Marine Offizier (Naval Officer). I thought this was more than a bit amusing since during my fitting, a native German was being dressed as an American MP sergeant. I guess I looked a bit more Aryan.

When I arrived at Maske (in another building, this one heated), I was told they were a bit too busy and I should come back in half an hour. One of the women there added that it would be my last chance to make a break for it and save my hair. Tempting.

So I went back to the café on the lot where I had lunch and bought some coffee and a piece of tiramisu to ease the pain a bit. I then walked back to Maske to face the haircut. Despite my hopes, there were no last minute offerings of clemency from the casting department.

The woman who cut my hair was thrilled with the color and saved many of the hair clippings. (To what end I don’t know, but it was more likely for color comparison than to extract DNA for cloning.) I was told (in that first phone conversation) that I was needed on Thursday for shooting, but I wasn’t told when. I figured someone would be able to tell me at the studio. Unfortunately, no one had any idea, so I had to await another phone call on Wednesday. I didn’t find out until late Wednesday night as we drove home from fencing. I had a message on my cell phone with that familiar admonition, “don’t be late,” in English this time for added emphasis.

So, I arrived 15 minutes early to Maske as ordered. After waiting about a half hour (this time I brought a book and plenty of warm clothes), I was informed that I needed to go to Kostüm. Of course, once I got there I was informed I was late and rushed to put on my uniform. We (there were four of us now) were then herded into a van and driven back to the building the Maske was in. I was told  my hair was still too long and sent back up for another cut. This time I didn’t mind it so much because the first cut wasn’t really to my liking. The second one, while short, was quite good. So, after being rushed all over the lot in such a panic, we were left in a room for about a half hour before anyone came to get us. At that point, it was back in the van to be rushed over to the set (about 50 meters from Kostüm).

The set was the same one used in “Das Boot”. For those not familiar with the film, it’s about a World War II U-boat… I’m 6’4” (or ~195cm), and I’m playing the captain during an inspection by Minister Speer. We do a brief walk through the scene and the director then gives me a line to say. Now, I’ve been in Germany about eight months now and I’ve gotten much better at the language. Unfortunately, I had NO IDEA what he wanted me to say. I couldn’t even mimic it. I think the gist of the line was “it’s an honor, Herr Minister.” Those last two words I understood. After apologizing and explaining that I wasn’t, in fact, German, he changed the line to “danke, Herr Minister.” That I could say although I was certain my accent would give me away. After three takes, we were done with the filming and I’m happy to say I never once banged my head. I even found the one place on the set where I could stand upright, which is good since it’s wouldn’t do for an officer to be slouching in the presence of a superior.

 
I'm not really a U-boat captain, but I play one on TV.